Porque negra tengo el alma

I felt like I had a hangover this morning. Well, it was afternoon when I woke up actually, so that may explain it. But I'd prefer to blame Aoife some more. As if her party's drunkenness just wafted into my sleep and dehydrated me.

I hate groups of people. When I'm not in one. Not that I'm jealous and want to be in the group--I am content being alone most of the time. But people turn into assholes when they're in groups. A group of four is the worst. Because they always have to walk next to each other and take up the whole side walk or pathway or whatever. There's a section in Notes from Underground where the guy works up the nerve to keep his path and just run into this other guy. It takes him a week or something and when he finally does it it's not satisfying at all. But anyway now every time I'm walking toward a group that's pretending to be oblivious or overly important, or maybe they just really are assholes and don't care, I think about that passage. And I don't move until the last second. I mean c'mon, I'm already walking on the very edge of the path and why the hell should I walk on the grass just because you're too inconsiderate to stay on your damn side? And it's always that outside person that's not really in the conversation so maybe they're afraid that if they move their outsider status will be confirmed. It's so stupid. I brush by people all the time on purpose.
In high school there was this girl who called me a bitch because I accidentally pushed her. Those hallways get packed and she was in one of those groups that just stand in a circle by the lockers like a tumor and I walked by all nerdy with a bunch of books and her obnoxiously big and totally empty backpack was sticking out into the stream of things, and when I passed her I wasn't going to try to avoid it. So I pushed by her and she got jostled a bit and she just turned and glared at me and said "bitch" like those stupid girls you see on "Underage and Pregnant" or whatever that show is. I've never glared at someone so hard in my life. Other than Whitney. If I had time to push her again I might have.

There's a man in my Sociology tutorial--a "mature student." I think that's funny. They're saying all the normal college aged people aren't mature and only those over 45 are. It's funny until I actually think about it. It's mostly true. But anyway this guy has the weirdest mumbly accent and I can't understand him until he says something a second time and I'm concentrating with furrowed brow and all that shit, but even then it's not worth listening to because he always answers a different question. Or he just says what he wants to say regardless of what's actually being discussed. The last tutorial was yesterday and one of the essay questions is going to be on gender and he just goes on and on about a person's sex. And "joost cause yar geey or street it don't min" something irrelevant. I stopped listening. And the tutorial teacher person is trying to explain to him that there's a difference between sex and gender and identity, but he either doesn't care or doesn't understand because he just keep slurring on about gay people in prison. He works in a prison apparently and that's where he gets all his social experiences. Poor guy.

Athens class is done. I felt a little bad because he was very normal and chilled out today and he passed around this questionnaire/survey thing about his class. Just talking about him and being frustrated is one thing, but I can't commit to writing bad things about people anonymously on papers they are going to read looking for something constructive.

Madre I made that tortilla soup from World Market and I'm going to eating it for days. It makes sooooo much. Barely fit in the pot and I was scared it was going to boil over the whole time. It's grand though.